As you all probably know, “The Kama Sutra” has announced a new sex position. It’s called The plumber: You stay in all day and nobody comes!
Here at ICFhome.ca, we love a good plumbing joke.
Plumbing is the only game where a good flush beats a full house every time! So, every year we compile a list of some of our favorite bits of plumbing related humor and funny pictures to share with you.
But first you have to understand the technology:
Our contestants for the plumber of the year are closely monitored and medically supervised.
Disclosure: No plumber was hurt during the filming of the following scenes. But all of them should have been punched in the balls.
The plumber that did the above job signed up for one of those ‘learn to be a plumber in 6 weeks’ courses you see in the papers. His final exam was at 9am yesterday. He showed up at 3pm, looked at the exam paper and said, “Looks like I am going to need a pen for this job – I will have to pop round to my suppliers for one. Be right back.” He came top of his class.
The guy above was called to an upscale apartment in Toronto to repair a leaking pipe. Upon arriving, he found that the woman was dressed provocatively and seemed to be hovering around him. After a while, the two became a little friendly and things got heated between them. At around 5 p.m., the phone rang and she hurried off to answer it, returning with the bad news that her husband was on his way home. She said, “Tonight is his bowling night, so why don’t you come back around 8 p.m. and we can finish this?” The plumber replied, “What, on my own time?”
Somebody broke into the police station and stole the only toilet in the building. Right now the cops are anxious to apprehend the perpetrator but they have nothing to go on.
Plumbers never get nervous. How do we know? Well, have you ever seen a plumber biting his nails?
A man at an airport shows off pictures of his three sons to a friend. “What do your boys do for a living?” asked the man. “Well my youngest is a neurosurgeon and my middle is a lawyer,” he replied. “What does the oldest do?” the man asked. The father replied, “He’s the plumber that put them through school.”
How are, a doctor and a plumber alike? They both bury their mistakes.
A doctor had a backed up toilet and knocked on his neighbour’s door in the middle of the night. The neighbour, a plumber, complained that he was sleeping and it’s his day off, but the doctor replied, “I’m always on call!” The plumber wearily got dressed, went over to the doc’s toilet, lifted the lid, tossed in two aspirins and said, “If it’s still like this in the morning, give me a call.”
In the morning, after a two-minute job the plumber demanded $150. The doctor exclaimed, ‘I don’t charge this amount even though I am a surgeon.” The plumber replied, “I agree, you are right. I too, didn’t either, when I was a surgeon. That’s why I switched to plumbing!”
This plumber was working in a house when the lady of the house said to him, “Would it be okay for me to take a bath while you’re eating lunch?” The plumber stopped working, sat on the toilet and replied, “It’s okay with me lady, as long as you don’t splash my sandwiches.”
On a plumber’s truck : ” We repair what your husband fixed.”
The following is a true story:
A plumber hobbles down the road in a cast and meets a friend. “How did you break your leg?” asked the friend “It’s like this,” he replied: “This guy had promised his wife that he would fix the sink plumbing on a particular day. That day, he realized he would need to stay late at work, so he called me. I stopped by the man’s office for the house key, and went to work.
“When the wife got home, she saw my bottom half protruding from the sink cabinet. She assumed it was her husband, and proceeded to remove my trousers and give me some, … intimate attention.
“I was so startled I bumped my head and was knocked out. The woman pulled me out, and must have fastend my trousers and called an ambulance.
“When the medics were carrying me out, they asked what had taken place – When I told them, they laughed so hard that they dropped me. That’s when I broke my leg!”
A few of other contestants that almost won:
And the Plumber of the Year 2015 Winner is:
The idiot that did the above should have been punched in the balls – twice!
We hope you enjoyed it! Leave us a comment letting us know your favourite, or send us a plumbing joke of your own, or just like us somewhere…
Plumber of the Year 2015 - Awards
2 comments:
I was very pleased to find this site.I wanted to thank you for this great read!! I definitely enjoying every little bit of it and I have you bookmarked to check out new stuff you post. hot water heater
First off, let me say my wife was totally offended by about ninety percent of this blog. I thought it was hilarious and was laughing so hard, she had to come and see what was so funny. However, some of that crazy plumbing makes me think a person better do some research before hiring just any plumber!
Peter Wilson @ Rumpca Services
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